


'Tis the Season

by Usami_chan13



Category: Tales of Symphonia
Genre: Christmas, F/M, Gen, Post-Game(s), slight romance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2011-12-23
Updated: 2011-12-23
Packaged: 2017-11-05 23:51:43
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 13,336
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/412408
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Usami_chan13/pseuds/Usami_chan13
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Zelos wished for the same thing every year,  but stopped believing he'd  ever get it. Will he finally get his wish?  It's possible, for what  better time for a miracle than Christmas?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Best Time of the Year

**Author's Note:**

> My first Christmas story in a long time. I wrote this mainly because I really liked Zelos' character and back story, and I was surprised with other _Tales of Symphonia_ Christmas stories that didn't have Zelos trying to celebrate Christmas while dealing with his past. Plus, Zelos is the only main character whose past isn't revealed to the other characters in the game. Only Lloyd ever finds out about it, and that's only an optional scene. It's quite a long story, though, longer than I expected it to be. But I hope you guys like it anyway! Enjoy, and Merry Christmas!

"Everything is all ready for you," the girl behind the counter said, holding out the large colorful bag. "Thank you for your patronage, Master Zelos."

The redhead grinned, letting his fingers brush hers as he took the bag from her. "The pleasure was all mine, my little Christmas hunny," he replied with a wink.

The girl blushed and giggled to herself as Zelos retreated back to where his sister stood waiting for him.

"Is it right to manipulate cashiers like that just for a discount, especially this close to Christmas?" Seles chastised as the two of them exited the store.

"Well, _she_ was the one who offered to cut the price," Zelos protested teasingly. "And really, it would have been rude to reject such a generous gesture."

Seles rolled her eyes, but said nothing as she instead shivered, wrapping her coat tighter around her body.

This did not go unnoticed by Zelos, however, and his demeanor was quickly subdued as he turned to her. "You okay?" he asked softly.

"Just fine," she replied…a little too quickly for his liking.

"You sure? We can head back home if you want."

"I said I'm all right," she insisted. "Besides, don't we have to finish shopping for presents for your friends?"

He frowned. "They're _your_ friends too, y'know. And we can always finish this up some other time if you're tired…"

She shook her head. "I'm _fine_ , really. You worry too much, Brother."

Zelos sighed, rubbing the back of his head. Though he realized that he _had_ gotten a little more protective of her recently, he believed that he had the right to worry. Seles had always been susceptible to sickness, even when she was equipped with an Exsphere. But after they'd taken it from her as part of Lloyd's plan to destroy all Exspheres, her health only continued to deteriorate more rapidly, and she became ill much more often. So he felt that his concern for her was justified.

Still, after a moment of silence, he reluctantly said, "All right. Just let me know if you wanna head back, okay? Just say the word, and I'll take you home straight away."

Seles rolled her eyes again at her brother's excessiveness, even as she wrapped her arms around herself to stay warm.

Watching her for a moment, Zelos then shrugged his own coat off. "Here," he said, handing it to her.

She looked at it with a puzzled frown, then up at him. "I don't need –"

Without letting her finish, Zelos draped the thick coat over her shoulders. "Just take it," he insisted. "It's supposed to start snowing sometime, so it's only gonna get colder."

As she grasped the edge of the garment with her fingers, she allowed a small smile to form on her lips. "Really? Didn't it snow here just last year?"

Zelos shrugged once again as they continued on their way through town. "Did it? I was out of town around this time last year, so I wouldn't know." That was partially true, at least. He _had_ been out of town at the time…but only because he _knew_ that it would be snowing.

Unaware of that, Seles simply nodded. "It lasted quite a while too, which is strange. It never used to snow this often in Meltokio…"

"Yeah well…" Zelos brushed some strands of his crimson hair out of his eyes. "I wouldn't be surprised if this became a normal thing."

Seles regarded her brother curiously. "What do you mean?"

He glanced at her, only for a moment before quickly looking away again. "See, a lot of strange things started happening after we reunited the two worlds. There were a lot of weird climate problems, like deserts freezing over or lakes drying up." Looking up at the sky, Zelos sighed. "Meltokio getting a little snowfall during the winter…wouldn't be the worst thing that could happen…"

Seles walked beside him quietly for a moment, her eyes shifting over the ground. Then she looked back at him. "So…why do you sound as if it is?"

Zelos looked at her in surprise. He hadn't realized that he had slipped like that, even if only a little. So with a smile, he replied, "It's nothing to worry about, my dear little sister. Although I must admit I'm touched to see you concerned about me."

She blushed a little, crossly turning her face away. "Why would I be concerned over someone as irresponsible as you?"

Zelos laughed. Though the two of them were still getting used to each other due to his various traveling trips, he had finally spent enough time around her to know that, despite her harsh words, she didn't quite mean what she said. But he also spent enough time with her to know which buttons to push, and he did enjoy teasing her occasionally.

And it worked well enough for now, to get her mind off their previous conversation. Because he knew that she didn't really remember the incident that occurred, all those years ago. She knew _of_ it, of course, and she understood what her mother had done. But Seles didn't know all of the details, and he would just have to be a little more careful to make sure she didn't find out.

She didn't need to know anyway, as far as he was concerned…why he hated the snow…

* * *

The sound of the door chime suddenly echoed throughout the house, and Zelos paused just as he was passing by the entrance. "I got it!" he announced, loud enough for Sebastian to hopefully hear wherever he was. Then he quickly unlocked the door and threw it open, revealing the blue-haired noble standing on the other side.

"Hey, Lord Bryant!" Zelos greeted cheerily, stepping aside to allow him to enter. "Glad you could make it. I was worried that you wouldn't get my message in time."

"Well, it was fortunate then, in this rare case, that I was held up at the company longer than expected," Regal replied, brushing the snow from his coat.

Zelos stood watching the other silently for a moment before he grinned. "This _is_ the season of miracles," he joked. When Regal rolled his eyes, he laughed and moved to help the other with his luggage…taking the smaller bag, of course. "Follow me. I'll show you to your room."

Regal frowned curiously, but followed nonetheless. "Is Sebastian not here?"

"Nah, he's here. But he's helping the others with the Christmas decorations."

The older aristocrat glanced around the main entrance, noticing the mansion _did_ somewhat lack a Christmas feel about it. "I take it you weren't originally planning on decorating then."

Zelos shrugged. "There wasn't a point before; the mansion would've been empty. And then we changed plans at the last minute, so we didn't have time to pull the Christmas stuff out. I'm just glad Colette talked the others into helping us decorate."

Regal nodded as they began climbing a flight of stairs, catching the shadows amongst the light of a nearby room and hearing familiar voices. "What _was_ the reason for the sudden decision to celebrate Christmas here instead of Iselia?" he wondered.

Zelos rubbed his chin, silent as he seemed to think. "Well," he said slowly, "it was either because Seles wasn't feeling well…or because I made the mistake of telling Colette how pretty Christmas time was in Meltokio, and she wanted come see the city's decorations instead. I'm not sure which."

He noticed the questioning glance that he received from the company president, but said nothing else about the matter. The truth was his sister had indeed fallen ill around the time they were preparing to leave for Iselia, and the doctor that treated her insisted that she not travel in her current state. When Zelos had sent word to Lloyd and Colette explaining why they wouldn't be joining the group for Christmas, it was Colette's idea for them to go celebrate the holidays in Meltokio instead. And though he worried a little about how the festivities might affect Seles's health, he thought it wouldn't hurt and agreed.

He didn't want Seles to blame herself for the sudden change in plans however, and luckily Colette agreed. So, while he mentioned to the others about Seles's illness so they knew not to stress her and accidentally make it worse, he also mentioned Colette's involvement so that there was someone else to take responsibility for their plans' alterations (which actually was Colette's idea).

As they finally arrived at one of the empty guestrooms, Regal thanked the younger man as he stepped inside. "Perhaps that's for the best, then," he said, continuing with their previous conversation. "If Lloyd and the others really wish to learn about Christmas, it would be more helpful to them if they experience the holiday somewhere it is celebrated first."

"I guess," Zelos conceded, placing the noble's bag on the bed. "It's just too bad that means we're stuck celebrating it _here_."

Regal raised a curious brow. "Is that really such a terrible thing?"

"Uh…" Zelos cleared his throat. "I was just looking forward to spending Christmas over there, y'know? I mean, I've spent Christmas _everywhere_ in Tethe'alla, and it would've been cool to spend it somewhere different… _especially_ if they've never celebrated Christmas before. Just imagine all the women I could've had, teaching them about the _joys_ of the holidays…"

Regal shook his head, causing Zelos to grin in relief. "Anyway," he continued, "when you're finished settling in, you feel up to helping us finish decorating the mansion?"

"Certainly," Regal replied, turning to look at the redhead. "But is there anything left to do?"

"Most likely. Like I said, we weren't planning on doing anything before, so I'm sure there's plenty to do around here. And if not, I'm sure we can find _something_."

Regal nodded, a small smile on his lips. "All right. I'll be down in a little while."

"'Kay. I'll let the others know you're here." As Zelos was about to leave and let the older aristocrat unpack, though, he caught a glimpse of snowflakes passing the window as they fell. He frowned a little, shaking his head and quickly heading out of the room, but the familiar chill already spread throughout his body.

At the moment, he _definitely_ would have preferred Iselia's warmer weather…

* * *

"Ow! Hot!" Zelos exclaimed as he quickly retracted his hand.

Sheena rolled her eyes, sliding a spatula under one of the cookies in front of them. "I told you to leave them alone," she retorted, sounding almost smug.

Zelos sucked his finger and thumb to help alleviate the burn, watching as she placed the cookies on another tray to cool. "I thought the whole point was to eat them."

"True, but we should wait until they've cooled a bit," Regal replied, opening the oven to swap one baking tray for another. "Besides, these are for the gingerbread houses that we're supposed to build later."

Zelos sighed, leaning against the counter. "Yeah, yeah. Whose idea _was_ that, anyway?"

Sheena glared at him. " _Mine_."

Glancing at the ninja, Zelos chuckled sheepishly. "Oh, right…"

She swatted his shoulder with her spatula, somewhat teasingly. "How about letting us finish up here while you go be 'useful' somewhere else?"

"All right, all right, I know when I'm not wanted…" Still, the redhead lingered for a moment longer, and when Sheena turned to assist Regal further, he snatched one of the gingerbread men from the cooling rack and took a bite of it as he hurried off.

As he headed towards the main living room, he found Colette standing on a small stepping ladder while Lloyd held it to keep it from wobbling, slightly blocking the doorway that separated it from the kitchen. Carefully he scooted around them, then stood a few feet away as he watched the blonde angel trying to hang something in the arching frame.

"Careful," Lloyd said, watching as Colette strained to reach the beam above her.

"I know," she replied, standing on tiptoe to reach farther.

"Are you sure you don't want me to do it?"

"I've got it, Lloyd," she reassured him. With one last stretch, she finally managed to hang the small berried plant from the hook waiting for it. "There! I did it!"

Lloyd smiled and helped her down. "Nice job, Colette."

Returning the smile, she then turned to Zelos. "What do you think, Zelos? Does it look okay?"

Looking up at the small green sprig, the redhead finished his gingerbread man and brushed the crumbs from his fingers. "Where'd you guys get that?" he wondered.

"Sebastian," Lloyd replied. "He asked me and Colette to hang it up here."

Zelos grinned; he always knew there was a reason he kept Sebastian around. "Well, it looks great. But…"

The two of them looked at him curiously. "Did we not do it right?" Colette asked.

"No, you guys did it perfectly. It's just…do you guys even _know_ what it is?"

"Uh…" The twin-swordsman thought for a moment. "Sebastian called it…'mistletoe', I think. Right?"

If possible, Zelos's grin grew wider as he folded his arms over his chest. "Yup. The thing is, though, people who are caught under the mistletoe have to _kiss_."

At first the two simply blinked, a little unsure of what Zelos was getting at. But when the redhead pointed up, reminding them of where they were standing, they finally realized what he was implying and both their eyes widened. "Wh-what?" Lloyd sputtered, he and Colette blushing furiously. "A-are you serious?"

Zelos nodded. "Yup. It's a Christmas tradition."

Lloyd and Colette glanced up at the mistletoe hanging above them, then turned back to look at each other. Neither for them moved for a while, only continuing to stare at each other in shock.

Until Colette smiled shyly, and said in a small voice, "It's…tradition, right?"

Lloyd swallowed thickly, the nervous blush on his cheeks growing darker. "I-I…I don't think…I mean, I'm not sure if…"

Colette's face fell slightly. "O-oh. I see…"

Zelos shook his head. Once again, he would have to help out somehow. "It's not good to disregard tradition like that, Lloyd," he chided, taking a step towards them. "And it's even worse to disappoint a lady like that. But if you're not comfortable with it, _I'll_ gladly do it."

The brunet turned to him sharply. "What?"

Zelos smirked, ignoring Lloyd as he approached Colette. "Let _me_ show you how it's done," he said, about to move in between the two.

"N…No way!" Lloyd tolerated a lot of Zelos's behavior, but he was _not_ about to let him _kiss_ Colette. So, without thinking, he pushed the redhead away.

Zelos stumble back a bit, but easily caught himself and turned to Lloyd. "Huh…Didn't realize you were so eager. Well then? What are you waiting for? Go ahead."

Lloyd faltered a little, self-conscious about how his actions made him look. Then he turned to Colette, who watched him with a mix of curiosity and expectation. He swallowed apprehensively before slowly leaning towards her, and both their eyes closed as his lips met hers.

They remained that way, a beat longer than either of them expected to. But after what seemed like forever, he gently pulled away, and they stared at each other in silence, their breaths caught in their throat.

The only snapped out of their daze when Zelos unexpectedly chuckled, and they looked at the redhead as he rubbed his chin thoughtfully.

"Not bad," Zelos appraised. "But a kiss on the cheek would've been okay too."

" _What_?" Lloyd turned to the other swordsman, his body stiff. "Why didn't you tell me that before?"

Zelos shrugged. "Must've slipped my mind."

"Are you kidding?" Lloyd snapped back. "You mean I didn't _have_ to kiss Colette like _that_?"

"Was…was it really _that_ bad?" Colette asked softly, looking up at Lloyd sadly.

Suddenly realizing how his words sounded, Lloyd faced her again. "N-no! Colette, it's not that! I-I just…!"

Zelos snickered. "I'll just let you guys work this out then," he said, waving as he continued on his way. He heard Lloyd calling after him, but he knew the other couldn't leave until he made sure Colette was all right. And knowing Lloyd, that could take a while.

Heading into the living room, he was surprised to see only Genis and Presea decorating the Christmas tree. He was about to ask about Genis's sister, but a glance around showed her curled up on the couch with her nose buried in a book.

"Um…" Zelos began, but didn't get a chance to ask when Sebastian suddenly appeared, seemingly out of nowhere, and approached the professor.

"Here is the book you asked for, Lady Raine," the butler said as he placed the tome on a stack of other books beside her.

"Hmm…thanks," Raine murmured distractedly, her eyes never leaving the page.

Zelos blinked, watching her curiously before looking toward Genis who was watching nearby.

Genis simply rolled his eyes and shook his head. "She wanted to research more about Christmas and the reason behind its traditions," he answered, returning his attention to the tree.

"Ah." That was all the explanation Zelos needed. Quickly losing interest, he turned to Sebastian. "Where's Seles?"

"She was feeling a bit unwell," Sebastian replied. "She retired to her chambers for some rest."

"Oh…" Zelos frowned, concerned for his sister but knowing there was nothing he could really do for her. Still, he decided to at least check on her later. "Okay. Thanks, Sebastian."

"Oh, Master Zelos," the butler said as Zelos was about to leave again. He retrieved a nearby package and presented it to the redhead. "I picked these up for you, just as you asked."

Zelos thought for a moment, trying to remember what he'd requested from Sebastian. Then his eyes lit up with remembrance. "Oh yeah! Awesome. Thanks!" He took the package from the elder man and quickly opened it.

Taking a break from the tree, Genis and Presea approached the redhead and watched him curiously. "What's that?" Genis wondered.

With a grin, Zelos retrieved a stocking from the box with Genis's name stitched in the white cuff. "Personalized stockings," he replied, showing it to the half-elf. "I figured that since you guys have never celebrated Christmas before and probably don't have one, I'd go ahead and get 'em for ya. Actually, I just went ahead and got one for everybody. Y'know, since I'm such a nice guy and all."

Genis frowned. "What are they for?"

"Traditionally, stockings are hung on the mantle of the fireplace," Presea replied.

"Yup." Reaching into the box, Zelos pulled out more of the stockings and moved towards the fireplace. "On Christmas Eve, when everyone's asleep, Santa Claus comes down the chimney to deliver presents, and leaves little things like candy and stuff in the stockings."

"Is that the guy who's supposed to travel around the world and bring presents to good children?" Genis asked, the skepticism clear in his tone.

"That's the guy," Zelos affirmed, checking the first stocking he hung before working on the next one.

Genis frowned deeper. "How does he even know what kids ask for?"

"Well, usually kids write Santa a letter before Christmas."

"And how does he know which kids are good or bad?"

"He has a list."

"But how does he _know_?"

Zelos rolled his eyes. "He just does."

"And how is he supposed to travel around the whole world and deliver all those presents in just _one_ night? Wouldn't that be kind of hard?"

The redhead chuckled. "Well, it might be a little harder now that the world is bigger. But I'm sure he could manage."

"It just doesn't really seem possible," Genis argued.

Zelos glanced at him curiously with a brow raised. "After everything we've seen, you think _this_ is impossible?"

To that, Genis had the grace to seem a little embarrassed. Still, he continued, "It just doesn't make any sense."

"It's only a Christmas story," Presea explained. "It's something children believe in, and realize it's not real when they're older."

"Way to kill the magic, Presea," Zelos said as he finished the last of the stockings. "But fine. Santa is a fairy tale who kids think is responsible for bringing their Christmas presents every year."

Genis shook his head. "I can't believe you tell those kinds of stories to children. Who would ever believe in something so ridiculous like that?"

Suddenly, Colette all but skipped over to where they were, and she seemed to be in a better mood than when Zelos left her. With her she had a pad of paper, a pen, and an excited smile on her face. "Hey, have you guys finished your letters to Santa yet?"

Genis and Presea blinked, staring at her in disbelief for a moment before looking at Zelos. He simply shrugged.

"You told her about Santa?" Genis asked, his voice hushed.

"I might've," Zelos replied, just as quietly.

"But you didn't tell her that he's not real?"

"Well, I didn't know she'd really go for it…"

"You should tell her the truth," Presea whispered.

The redhead grinned. "Now where's the fun in that?"

"I haven't really started on mine yet," Colette continued, oblivious to the others' conversation. She tapped the pen to her chin thoughtfully. "I'm not really sure what to ask for."

"Just ask for whatever you want," Zelos replied, turning away from the younger two. "It doesn't matter what it is, I'm sure Santa will give it to you."

Colette frowned, uncertain. "I don't want to be selfish, though…" She looked up at Zelos. "Do you know what you're asking for?"

Zelos shrugged. "I always ask for the same thing every year."

"Every year?" Colette repeated, surprised. "Does that mean you haven't gotten it yet?"

He rubbed the back of his head. "Well…"

Giving in to humoring Colette's childlike belief, Presea asked in an almost teasing tone, "Is it because Zelos is naughty?"

Zelos chuckled. "Now, if I was naughty, I would have gotten a lump of coal instead. So I can safely say that I haven't been naughty."

Genis snorted. "I find _that_ hard to believe…"

"But then why haven't you gotten it yet?" Colette pressed. "What _is_ it?"

Zelos felt himself stiffen a little as Genis and Presea turned to him, all three of them waiting to hear his answer. Thinking for a moment, he then said, "Have you even thought of how you're getting that letter to Santa?"

Colette gasped. "Oh my gosh! That's right! I have to get it to Santa if he's gonna deliver it! It's not too late, is it?"

"Well, it's kinda pushing it, Christmas Eve being his busiest day of the year and all." Zelos rubbed his chin thoughtfully. "But if you hurry and finish your letter, we can try what Sebastian used to do for me when _I_ was a kid, and waited until last minute to write my letter. Okay?"

Smiling, Colette nodded. "Okay!"

Zelos grinned. "Great. So you work on your letter, and I'll go find Sebastian." With that, he turned and headed off, glad that that was enough to distract Colette. But he had to do his best to ignore Genis and Presea's curious eyes, knowing they were fully aware that he never answered the question.

Not that it really mattered anyway. He may have asked for it every year, but he stopped expecting to get it a long time ago.

* * *

"Oh wow!" Colette exclaimed, spinning in a circle where she stood. "It's all so pretty!"

Zelos grinned a little, glancing at the lights and pieces that decorated the city. "Nice, huh?" he replied, once again taking a few steps when everyone caught up. "If there's one thing rich folks know how to do, it's show off."

Sheena snorted softly. "No kidding."

Regal glanced around the city as well as he pulled his collar up. "It does seem common for nobles to be a bit…excessive," he acknowledged, sounding almost uncomfortable by the fact. "The decorations back in Altamira are also quite extravagant."

"Really?" Lloyd asked. "Maybe if we do this Christmas thing next year, we can celebrate it over there and see."

"Hmm…" The blue-haired president paused thoughtfully, taking in the lights that brightened up Meltokio. "Perhaps. Though I must admit, the decorations back home pale in comparison to those here in the capital."

Zelos blinked, turning to the older aristocrat in surprise. He had spent the holidays in Altamira before, and was always so impressed by the Christmas decorations that lit up the seaside city. So he couldn't help but ask, "Why's that?"

The older noble glanced up at the sky. "Well, there is no real difference between the appearances of the two cities. But the scene of the city lights with the fallen snow here certainly has more of a Christmas feel than in Altamira."

"The lights also seem to be brighter here," Presea added.

"It's the way the snow reflects the light," Raine explained. "The plain whiteness makes the lights seem much brighter."

"And the snowflakes kinda look like they're shining too," Genis said.

Colette's smile widened and she held her hand out, catching a snowflake in her palm. "Like little stars," she said. She spun around again, her arms outstretched and her head tilted back to look up at the sky. "That's why it's so pretty here!"

Zelos frowned, glancing up at the snowflakes as they fell from the clouds above. He had hoped it would stop snowing by the time they had finished decorating the mansion, but luck was not with him that evening. And since it had been dark when they finished and he had promised to show them around, he had no choice in the matter but to take them out in the snow.

A shiver ran down his spine suddenly, and it had nothing to do with the cold. Doing his best to ignore it, he turned to his sister. "You all right, Seles?" he asked softly.

Though she shivered and pulled her coat tighter, she looked up at him and smiled. "I'm fine," she assured him.

Zelos couldn't but smile a bit as well. He knew Seles had been looking forward to this as much as he had. When she had been locked up in the abbey, she wasn't able to see much of the city during Christmas time. When she had finally been released, he promised to show her around during the holidays so she would be able to see the lights and decorations. He'd been busy last year, though, traveling around and working to settle things between the two lands that once were separated, and she had wanted to wait until he was able to keep his promise. He understood how much this meant to her, and she didn't want to miss it even though she wasn't feeling well.

So he would just have to keep an eye on her, just to make sure she was all right.

"Oh wow!" Colette's voice pulled Zelos out of his thoughts, and he looked up in time to realize they were approaching the giant tree in the center of the city.

Grinning again, Zelos strode forward. "All right! I was hoping we haven't missed it."

"Isn't Christmas tomorrow?" Lloyd wondered. "How come that tree isn't lit up yet?"

"That's why we're here," Zelos replied, gesturing the tree with a grand wave of his arms. "Usually, they have the tree all lit up and ready a few weeks before Christmas, but they never have the star on top until tonight, Christmas Eve. Soon, they're gonna shut off all the lights in the city so they can light up the tree, starting with the star on top. They do it this way every year." He paused for a moment, then sighed. "I'm just glad we got rid of the Chosen system already."

Colette turned to him curiously. "How come?"

Zelos shifted, appearing rather embarrassed suddenly. "Well…every year, the church wanted _me_ to do the angel thing and light up the star for them…"

Sheena laughed. "Really? How come you never showed me that? I would've _loved_ to see it."

Zelos huffed. "Because it was stupid, that's why. They even made me wear this stupid angel costume and everything…"

Sheena and Genis snickered at the thought.

"But it seems like such an honor," Colette suddenly interjected. "Asking you to do something as important as lighting the tree on Christmas evening…"

"Christmas Eve," Seles corrected softly.

Colette nodded. "Right. And they knew you were the only one who could do it, because you're a real angel; a symbol of hope to people. So they _had_ to ask you, Zelos."

The redhead shrugged. "Maybe," he replied noncommittally. But he knew that the real reason the church asked him to do it was simply because it was part of the gimmick of his Chosen status. That was another reason he tried to spend the holidays somewhere other than Meltokio. He said nothing more about it, though, and let the subject drop.

"But is it really safe?" Genis wondered. "Shutting off the rest of the city's lights _just_ to show off this Christmas tree?"

Glancing up at the towering pine, Zelos folded his arms across his torso. "They only shut the lights off for a little while." He grinned. "Just enough time to let the people appreciate how awesome the tree is."

Sheena rolled her eyes, but admitted, "It _does_ look pretty cool."

Seles nodded in agreement, looking at the tree as well. "Even from the abbey, the Christmas tree was always such a sight. It'll be nice to see it up close, though."

Zelos' smile widened; despite her casual statement, he could hear in his sister's tone that she was excited to see the large tree in person, and he could see the small smile that seemed to light up her face. And he thought…maybe it was worth braving through the snow for that.

"Oh, this is so exciting!" Colette bubbled. "I can't wait for it to start!"

"Speaking of which," Lloyd muttered through chattering teeth, "when _is_ this thing gonna start?"

"They're waiting for the church bell to ring," Zelos replied. "It's supposed to build anticipation or something…"

It seemed to work, though; the growing crowd, echoing with a chorus of eager conversation, teemed with an enthusiasm that wafted through the air and warmed them despite the snow that continued to fall. A thrilling current lay beneath the surface of the Christmas tree site, spreading throughout all the people gathered around it.

But Zelos was no longer paying attention to the tree or the people around him. Instead, he found his focus drawn to a young girl twirling around in the snow, giggling as her dark green skirt flared out around her legs. A large black coat, a few sizes too big, was draped over her small figure, and a bright poinsettia flower was clutched tightly in one of her little hands.

"Yukirei," a woman watching nearby – the girl's mother, no doubt – called suddenly. "Be careful now."

The little girl, Yukirei, spun around to meet her mother. "Mommy, the tree is so big!" she exclaimed. "Can we go see the other side?"

"It will be the same on the other side, dear," the mother replied. "Let's at least wait until Papa gets here."

"Oh please, Mommy!" the girl pleaded, a pout lacing her tone. "Pretty, pretty please?"

The woman sighed. "All right…"

With a happy cry, Yukirei spun around and began heading towards where the group stood, her boots crunching the thick snow as she ran.

"Yukirei," the mother called, her pace much slower than her daughter's," be careful. You might slip."

The woman's warning went unnoticed as the girl continued to draw nearer. But Zelos could already see the mother's words rang true when Yukirei suddenly slipped and tumbled forward, landing on the soft cushion of slush. Still, even with the powder breaking her fall, the little girl began to cry.

With a sigh of fond exasperation, the mother approached the child and knelt down beside her. "I told you before not to run."

Yukirei continued to cry, and amidst her tears managed to whine, "Mommy, pick me up…"

The woman smiled kindly as she replied, "Now, now…You have to be the one to pick yourself up again when you fall."

The little girl began to cry anew, and Zelos frowned as he observed the scene. It was all too familiar with him, recalling his youth and similar words spoken by Sebastian and his own mother. Of course he knew that the words were chiefly said based on the Tethe'alla ideal of valuing an individual's own strength, and he could see that the woman was only doing this because she wanted her child to be capable of handling herself, just as Sebastian had done when Zelos was a child. But…still…

_If you can fall, then you can get up again._

It was difficult not to remember his mother's words and notice how the unsympathetic tone was much different than this mother's.

However, the words achieved their desired effect as the little girl slowly pushed herself from off the ground, and Zelos vaguely wondered if the little girl would grow up the way he had. 'Not likely,' he snorted in his mind as he watched the girl's mother try to comfort her.

Just as he decided it was time to mind his own business, a flash of color on the white ground caught his eye. He glanced down and noticed a poinsettia flower by his foot, probably belonging to the little girl who had lost it when she had tripped. He was a little surprised that he didn't notice it before, since the red flower stood out against the snow.

_Red snow…_

There was a rational part of his mind that knew a flower on the ground wasn't the same as _that_ – not even close. But somehow the thought still entered his mind, so suddenly that he staggered away from it purely on reflex, and he only stopped when he bumped into whoever was behind him.

Startled, he spun on his heel just in time as Raine did. She studied him for a moment, her face changing from mild annoyance to curious concern. "Zelos," she said, "are you all right?"

Zelos paused, doing his best to force his heart to stop racing. Finally he answered, "I'm fine."

She frowned, and he could tell she didn't believe him. "Are you sure? You appear a little distraught."

Slowly he took some deep breaths to calm himself down. Then, when he was sure he could speak with a clear voice, he said, "Yeah. This time of year always gets me a little emotional, that's all." He sighed with a dramatically playful tone. "So many memories."

The professor seemed more accepting of this answer; she simply shook her head, and for a moment Zelos believed that was the end of it. So he was surprised when she spoke again, "I hope there were some happy memories, at least."

He blinked. "Why wouldn't there be?"

"Well…" she began, her thoughtful tone soft against the chatter of the crowd, "the expression you made just didn't seem like there were any…"

Zelos glanced away, worried that his face would betray any more of his emotions. The constant reminder was a problem of being out in the snow like that. As he looked down, though, he once again caught sight of the poinsettia.

Ignoring the sensation of the red against the snow, he glanced up at the little girl who continue to cry. He fought the building panic as he reached down to pick up the flower – a shudder crawling up his arm as snow fell between his fingers – and made his way to the girl and mother.

Kneeling down in front of the girl, he smiled charmingly as she looked at him. "A lovely young girl shouldn't shed tears on Christmas Eve," he said, his voice soft and sweet.

She stared in surprise, sniffling as he held up the poinsettia flower before her. Wiping away her remaining tears, the girl timidly took the flower from him. "Thank you, Master Zelos," she hiccupped.

"It's a pretty flower," he replied, "but it pales in comparison to _your_ beauty."

The young girl blushed and giggled softly.

Turning to the mother, Zelos winked. "Such exquisiteness must run in the family."

Blushing shyly as well, the woman picked up her daughter. "Merry Christmas, Master Zelos," she mumbled as she headed away.

"Merry Christmas!" the little girl called as well.

Zelos gave a little wave as they disappeared around the other side of the tree before heading back to where his friends were, who had been watching the scene.

"You'll just flirt with anyone, won't you?" Sheena asked, rolling her eyes.

Zelos grinned. "What can I say? I just can't resist a girl in tears."

"Or any girl, for that matter," Genis retorted.

The redhead shrugged, but the grin still remained. Whatever reply he had, though, was drowned out when the bells of the church finally began to toll. Silence fell over the crowd as they listened to the bells ring; once, twice, three times before the lights in the city were all shut off. As the bells sounded their fourth chime, the star on the Christmas tree burst to life, bright against the darkness. Then the rest of the tree came on, starting from the top and spreading down to the bottom, the light appearing to reverberate as the bells echoed around the city.

"Oh…" Colette breathed, grasping Lloyd's arm, "it's so beautiful!"

There were similar murmurs of awe and agreement, but Zelos barely heard them, and was hardly paying attention to the tree. Because it was still snowing, and all he could see was the falling snowflakes reflecting the red Christmas lights…

* * *

Zelos sighed, a sound of annoyance mixed with relief as he ran a hand through his damp crimson hair. The snow had never let up during the entire Christmas tree lighting, leaving the whole group soaking wet by the time it was over and they returned back to the mansion. No matter how tiny they were, those little snowflakes had put him in a bad mood, even after his burning hot shower, and he was ready to just call it a night.

Unfortunately, the tree lighting had been such an excitement for the others. So instead of wanting to end the festivities, they all decided to stay up a while longer. What they were going to do, he wasn't sure, but the others were determined to figure _something_ out, and he couldn't get out of it.

Well…he _could_ if he really tried to. But what kind of host would that make him if he didn't stay to entertain his guests? Besides, it seemed as though some of them were beginning to think something was bothering him, and he didn't want to confirm any suspicions by turning in early.

So, with nothing left to do, Zelos released a long breath, doing his best to release his tension and put a smile on his face as he walked into the sitting room where the others were gathered around the fireplace and drinking from steaming mugs.

The redhead chuckled to himself. 'The perfect picture of winter,' he thought.

"Took you long enough," Sheena teased as Zelos sat on the floor beside Lloyd.

"What can I say?" the redhead replied, thanking Sebastian as the butler placed a mug of something hot on the table in front of him. "Taking care of my hair is a lot of work, especially around this time of year. I don't want it to get damaged from the wet cold or anything."

He grinned when most of them rolled their eyes or shook their heads, a perfectly normal reaction from them. If things continued like this, then he figured he wouldn't have anything to worry about. "So what'd I miss?" he asked, leaning back against the couch behind him.

"We were just telling the others stories about some of our past Christmas experiences," Regal enlightened him, motioning to Lloyd and the others.

"Ah." Zelos glanced at Sheen with a mischievous grin. "So you told them about the time you set your Christmas tree on fire then?"

The ninja's eyes widened as a small blush spread across her cheeks. "Shut up!" she hissed.

Zelos laughed. "Well, you told _me_ about it, so I don't see why you wouldn't tell everyone else."

Sheena glared at him. "It's not something everyone _needs_ to know."

"Why don't you tell us a story, Zelos?" Lloyd suggested, prompted to keep the peace by Colette.

"Hmm…" Zelos rubbed his chin as he thought. "I suppose I could…But the problem is picking which one to tell. I have so many…"

"Ugh, do we even _want_ to hear them?" Genis wondered under his breath.

"Um…could I make a suggestion?" Colette asked softly.

Turning to look at her, Zelos smiled. "Why of course, my little Christmas angel. Go ahead."

She smiled. "Can you tell us about the first time you saw snow?"

Zelos' smile fell and his eyes widened, his throat suddenly dry. "Wh…why would you wanna hear about that?"

"Well…" Colette shifted slightly, as though she assumed she did something wrong, "Seles and Sheena told us how it didn't always snow during the winter in Meltokio. So I was just wondering if you remember the first time you saw snow."

Zelos tried to swallow past the lump in his throat. "It…it happened a really long time ago…I don't know if I really remember…"

"Didn't you say that you were ten or so when you first saw snow?" Sheena asked with a wicked grin. "At least that's what you told _me_."

Zelos pouted at her, hoping it hid his grimace. He knew she was just trying to exact some playful revenge, but he barely told her anything about that time, other than that he was old enough to remember seeing snow. So of course she wouldn't know…

"If you were that old, you must remember what it was like to see it," Seles added. "Why don't you tell us about it?"

This time he did wince, unsure of how to respond to that. Though his sister sounded genuinely interested, there was also a hint of amusement at seeing him appear embarrassed. And of course she could joke about it, since she was never told the details. At the time of the incident, she had been too young to understand more than the general idea of what happened, and he never explained the rest when she got older.

He could feel everyone's gazes boring into him, waiting for him to speak. Desperately he glanced towards Sebastian, the only one who understood the reasons for his reluctance to reveal the story. But not even the butler knew everything that happened that day, for Zelos had left out something important when he described the event.

Still, sensing his master's discomfort, Sebastian cleared his throat, drawing the group's attention to where the butler was innocently dusting. "I imagine, what with it being Christmas Eve," he said, "it would be more appropriate for Master Zelos to share a story more related to the occasion. Such as the time when he and Lady Seles first met, perhaps?"

Zelos' eyes lit up at the recommendation. "Oh yeah, Seles and I _did_ met around this time, huh? I almost forgot about that."

Seles looked at her brother, a questioning expression on her face. "I don't remember that."

Zelos grinned. "You were too young to remember, I think…probably about two years old or so."

She frowned. "You knew about me for that long?"

He detected some guilt in her voice, but he shrugged it off as if he hadn't. "Well, I sorta already knew that Dad was already seeing your mom before then. But you were around two years old when we first learned about you, and boy, was my mom _pissed_."

That seemed to grab his friends' notice. "What happened?" Colette wondered, her enthralled expression matching the look in everyone else's eyes.

Zelos chuckled, settling back to tell his story. "Well," he began slowly to draw it out, "it happened one day several years ago around Christmas, when I heard my father talking to himself. He was wondering if he should get presents for someone named Seles…"


	2. What Christmas is All About

_The snowman collapsed in a pile of slush…He fell against the cold ground…He looked up, blinking as red snow began to fall…_

_A heavy pressure on top of him…His heart beating quickly in horror…His mother's blood staining the snow red around them…_

_Screaming…crying…calling for help…His mother reaching for him…her hand on his cheek…Blood touching her lips as she whispered…_

It would have been better if you hadn't been born…

_Her hand fell limp…More screaming that he never heard…Frozen as he stared at the tainted snow around, and his mother's words continued to echo in his mind…_

It would have been better if you hadn't been born…

oOoOo

Zelos bolted upright, gasping for air as he looked around frantically, his vision blurred by leftover tears. Realizing he was still in his bedroom, he sighed slowly, releasing his tight grip on the sheets to brush crimson strands from his sweat-slicked forehead.

He really shouldn't have been surprised that he'd had that old dream. Even though he managed to avoid telling that story to the others the previous night, it didn't stop him from thinking about it, even after everyone had finally called it a night and went to bed. It was the last thing on his mind when he went to sleep, so of course he'd been forced to dream about it through the night, and it was the first thing he thought of when he woke up. It only made sense.

Still…he was never prepared to have that dream…to relive that moment in his memories…

Honestly, he kind of wished that he could be one of those people who forgot about traumatic events like that; those people who repressed such a horrific memory and wouldn't remember it for a long time, if at all. But obviously he wasn't so lucky.

Rubbing away whatever slumber remained from his eyes (because he wasn't even sure if he _wanted_ to go back to sleep after that), he glanced out his window and sighed. Figures it would still be snowing. He knew there were probably a lot of people who hoped to wake up on Christmas morning to find new-fallen snow.

To him, though, it only reaffirmed that someone in the universe hated him.

With a sigh, Zelos slid out of bed and grabbed a nearby green robe, slipping it on as he headed out of his bedroom. Maybe one of the others was awake, and he'd at least have someone to bother and not think about what was going on outside. After all, misery loves company.

But he didn't even have _that_ to look forward to as he arrived in the main living room only to find it empty, and the echoing silence continued to hold the rest of the house in peaceful slumber. Grumbling a little to himself, Zelos debated whether to head back to the warmth of his bed and just lie there until the others woke, or start making some breakfast for himself.

In the middle of his plans, though, he paused just as he was passing the doors that led out back, watching the crystal flakes continue to fall. Unsure of what suddenly came over him, and quite unable to stop himself, Zelos opened the doors and stepped outside into the snow.

The thick powder crunched under his bare feet as they led him through the courtyard, moving him until he stood in a painfully familiar spot. Not since _that_ day did he ever come out behind the mansion, let alone when it was snowing, but he would never forget the spot where it happened.

The spot that, in his mind's eye, was always red soiling the white.

A tremor spread throughout his body, fueled by the rapid beating of his heart. The images from his dream – his nightmare, his memory – quickly flashed through his mind, and his breath grew shorter as crimson seemed to spread over his vision. Shaking, and not from the cold, he placed a hand to his head, unable to stop his mother's words from once again resounding in his head.

_It would have been better if you hadn't been born._

Zelos nearly jumped when he heard the snow crunch behind him, but he caught himself from spinning around in a panic. Instead he took a deep breath to calm himself so whoever was behind him wouldn't think anything was wrong.

"Perhaps it would benefit you to wear something warmer, Master Zelos," a voice behind him spoke up. "The last thing anyone would want on Christmas is to fall ill."

The redhead chuckled, finally turning to face Sebastian. "At least Seles would be in good company," he quipped.

Saying nothing at first, the butler simply looked up at the gray sky above them. "I am rather surprised you're out here, sir."

Zelos snorted. "You and me both. I don't even know why I came out here in the first place. I guess I was just looking for something to do until the others woke up."

Sebastian studied him for a moment, and Zelos had a strange reminiscence of the steward giving him a similar look back when he had been a child in trouble. "You know, sir," the older man finally said, "I remember a time when you were younger that you actually _enjoyed_ Christmas."

Zelos blinked, not having expected such a comment. "I still like Christmas…" he protested.

Sebastian folded his arms behind his back and squared his shoulders. "Many of the others don't seem to believe so."

Zelos huffed, his lips pressed in a thin line. "They say something to you?"

The elderly man nodded. "Yesterday, at one time or another, they expressed concerns that you were not quite yourself…including Lady Seles. They were not sure what it was exactly, but they were under the impression that something was not quite right with you."

"Crap…" Zelos groaned. He really thought he was doing a good job covering it up, but if they really noticed, than he had been more obvious than he thought.

"Master Zelos…" Sebastian said softly, hesitantly, as though wondering whether to continue or not. "Isn't it time…to put all this behind you?"

The redhead turned away from him, his eyes glaring at the "spot". "You think I haven't been trying?" he retorted; he tried so hard not to snap back, but it still came out wrong. "I would love nothing more than to just _forget_ all this and just get on with my life."

"It is not something you can so easily forget…nor should you, sir. But there is a difference between moving on from something…and simply running away from it."

Looking up, Zelos frowned and folded his arms over his chest. "You think I'm just running away from what happened?"

"You certainly haven't been dealing with the issue," Sebastian replied, undeterred by his charge's tone or stance. "This is the first in many years when you have remained in Meltokio during its snow winters, and you have never once visited either of your parents' graves. And you refuse to discuss it, closing yourself off and hiding behind a disguise when the subject arises."

Curling and uncurling his fingers, Zelos once again looked away from the butler. He always thought Sebastian knew him better than most people – the man had raised him more than either of his parents – but he never realized that Sebastian knew him _that_ well.

"Do you not see though, Master Zelos, how that only works against you? Because you do not acknowledge the matter, it remains there for you to hold on to. Even now, the retention of that day prevents you from truly enjoying the holiday with your friends. It is as though you keep it because there is something you do not wish to forget."

Zelos exhaled loudly. Truthfully, he would rather forget it. But the real problem was sometimes he felt that he didn't _deserve_ to forget.

"If you truly wish to 'get on' with your life," Sebastian said, "then the best thing to do is to confront the issue, working through it so you can let it go and move on."

Zelos scratched the back of his head, still avoiding the other man's eyes. He knew Sebastian had a point, but it was difficult. After all these years, was it not too late to move on from those memories? Could he really just let something like that go?

Could he ever look back at that day…and not be hurt by it?

* * *

"Okay, now you have to be careful when you get up," Zelos said, looking down at Colette as she lay on the ground. "Otherwise you'll ruin it."

"All right," she replied. Then she paused, looking at the powder around her. "Um…how do I do that?"

"Well, you gotta…I mean, you should try to…" Zelos paused, trying to figure it out. Truth was, he wasn't too familiar with the art of snow angels, so he didn't really know. Scratching his head, he then held out his hand to her. "Okay, here, gimme your hand."

She did so, and he carefully pulled her up. When she was on her feet, she slowly stepped forward so they could both look at the imprint of an angel.

"Wow!" she exclaimed, clasping her hands together. "It looks great!"

Zelos tilted his head, trying to look at the figure form another angle. "I guess…" He never really understood snow angels. "But aren't you sick of the idea of angels yet?"

Colette laughed softly. "A little bit," she admitted. Looking up at him, she smiled. "But I don't mind good angels."

At that, Zelos couldn't help but smile as well. As fellow Chosens, the two of them could talk to each other about things that many people couldn't understand. And though they both had mastered their angelic abilities since they had saved and reunited the worlds, they were tired of their wings. After all, while being angels certainly justified people's belief that angels would save them, at the same time it had nearly killed them both. They were both relieved that the Chosen system was abolished.

Even so, despite her weariness of her own divine nature, she still believed and appreciated "good" angels, and was willing to give them a chance…just as she would anyone she believed to be a decent person. She was a little naïve that way, but Zelos had to admit that he admired her for that.

Shrugging his shoulders and brushing some snowflakes from his coat, he looked to the mansion briefly before turning back to Colette. "So what do you wanna do now?"

She thought for a moment, tapping her chin with a finger. "Oh, I know!" she finally said. "Can we try making a snowman?"

Zelos coughed suddenly to try and hide the sounds of choking. "What do you wanna make a snowman for?"

Colette frowned a little. "Presea said making a snowman is a fun thing to do when it's snowing."

The image of a snowman collapsing abruptly flashed in his mind, and he tried to shake it away. "How about we have a snowball fight instead?"

"It wouldn't be much fun with just the two of us," Colette pointed out.

"I guess not," Zelos grumbled, wishing the others would hurry back.

That morning after breakfast, Seles had surprised him when she said she wanted to visit the cemetery before opening presents. Apparently there was some special service or something being held to honor the memories of departed loved ones on Christmas. And though her mother wasn't buried at that cemetery (at that time, many people didn't take the time to bury half-elves), she thought it would be a nice way to pay respects at any rate.

Many of the others agreed and wanted to join her, to pay respects to their own loved ones they had lost. But Zelos had refused to go. Even remembering what Sebastian had said to him before about facing his demons, he just couldn't do it now. Plus, he trusted Lloyd to take care of his sister, so he didn't really have to go with her.

Seles got angry with him, of course, saying how he should visit his parents on Christmas too. But he didn't blame her for that, since she didn't know why it was so hard for him. And after a while, his sister gave up trying and just left without him, followed by most of the others.

Oddly enough, Colette decided to stay with him at the mansion. She said it was because she had no departed loved one to think about, at least none that she knew, but Zelos suspected that she simply didn't want to leave him alone. He hated the idea of her pitying him, but honestly he didn't mind the company.

At least until Colette suggested they play around in the snow. He hadn't wanted to, but she insisted, and he could see that she'd been so excited to do so. So he sucked it up and went out with her.

It wasn't so bad, really. Despite being outside, he was kind of having fun. But the mention of a snowman just brought up _that_ day again, no matter how much he tried to fight the memories off, and he just couldn't help but dwell on it.

Maybe Sebastian was right after all.

"Zelos?" Colette's voice brought him out of his thoughts. "Do you like Christmas?"

He expected someone to ask him that after what Sebastian told him. But he wasn't sure if he expected Colette to be the one to ask him.

"I like Christmas," he replied. "Why do you ask?"

"Well…you haven't seemed very merry. And I've heard stories about people who hate Christmas."

Zelos laughed a little; he knew what kind of stories she heard. "It's not so much that I hate Christmas…I just hate snow. But since Christmas and snow are usually paired up, sometimes it's just easier to lump them together and dislike all of it."

"Oh…" She stood silent for a moment, considering all she heard while glancing up at the falling crystal. "But why do you hate snow? It's so pretty!"

He shrugged. "To some people, I guess. But to me, it's nothing but frozen rain."

"But rain is so important!" she argued. "A lot of things need rain to grow!"

Zelos turned to her, looking her square in the eyes as he asked, "But what needs the snow?"

Colette blinked, unable to think of an answer. The two remained quiet for a moment, the snow around them absorbing any sound that might break that stillness. Finally she asked softly, "If you hate snow so much, then how come you agreed to come outside with me?"

He shrugged again. "You really wanted to come out here."

"Oh…" She looked down at the ground. "I'm sorry I made you come out here."

He turned to her, surprised. "Oh hey, c'mon. You didn't make me come out here, and you don't have to be sorry. It's been kinda fun."

He smiled as she glanced up at him, and she returned with one of her own. He hated seeing women sad, but especially girls he knew really well, like Colette.

"But why do you hate snow in the first place?" Colette wondered, her head tilted curiously.

Zelos hesitated for a moment. Normally he would shrug it off and try to dodge the question with some silly or stupid comment. But this time, he seriously considered telling her. After all, maybe it would help him get past it and move on, just as Sebastian said. He had spent so much time trying to just avoid the ordeal, and it was hard to talk about. But who better to understand than his fellow former Chosen?

Just as he was about to say something – though _what_ , he wasn't sure – they both turned to the sound of the door opening and watched as Sebastian stepped outside.

"Master Zelos, Lady Colette," the butler said. "The others have returned from the cemetery. They are waiting for your attendance before they open presents."

Zelos sighed, unsure whether to feel relieved or annoyed for the interruption. "We'll be there in a minute."

Sebastian nodded and headed back inside, leaving the two alone again. Zelos then turned to Colette, who looked at him almost expectantly, as though waiting for him to make the first move.

With a small smile, he offered his hand. "Shall we?"

She seemed slightly disappointed, but a smile still lifted her lips as she took his hand and they both headed back inside.

Closing the door behind them, Zelos and Colette headed for the living room where the others were, excitedly chattering as they sorted the presents under the tree. Eagerly Colette went to help them, and Zelos went to stand by Sheena.

"Quite a haul you got," he appraised the pile of presents close to her.

The ninja smirked. "These are _your_ presents."

Zelos blinked, looking at the pile again. Truth be told, he'd received more gifts in the past than compared to the ones in front of him. In previous years, he had gotten more gifts than he could count, mostly from people trying to bribe him and get on his good side. But this year, when all the presents he received were from people he knew…it was a little strange to see so many gifts from those he considered close to him.

Strange…but touching all the same.

"Don't forget this one!" Colette exclaimed, handing him the stocking with his name on it.

Zelos held back a laugh as he took the garment from her. He had told Sebastian to stuff some things in the stockings to see if they could fool Genis into believe it was really Santa Claus. He didn't know what the butler put in them, though, and he was curious to find out.

But his smile disappeared as he pulled out a small snow globe, looking at it curiously. Inside the glass was a snow-covered house, completely adorned with Christmas decorations. He shook it slightly, watching the white flakes swirl and fall around the house. Then he looked up at Sebastian who was helping pass out some presents. The butler caught his eye and smiled, almost mischievously, pointing to the stocking before returning to his task.

Blinking, Zelos reached into the stocking again and pulled out a red-and-white piece of paper that he had missed before. He carefully unfolded it and read the letter written to him;

_To Zelos,_

_My apologize for taking so long to fulfill your Christmas wish. And no, I have never forgotten, even after all these years. But a wish like yours is difficult to grant, even for me. And yet, if you look around you at this very moment, you may realize you have ultimately granted your own wish after all!_

_Merry Christmas!  
Santa Claus_

Zelos blinked as he read the letter again. He understood why Sebastian had written the note this way, just to keep up the Santa illusion if any of the others happened to see his letter…Or at least he would have, if Sebastian had written the note. But he knew his butler's handwriting, and this letter certainly wasn't it. Unless he had someone else write the letter…he'd have to ask Sebastian about that sometime.

"Zelos?" He looked at Colette as she came to stand beside him. "Did you get what you asked for from Santa?"

The redhead paused, considering her question for a moment before watching the others in the room, talking and showing each other the presents they had gotten, laughing and having a good time. Then, looking over his letter again, he smiled. "Yeah…" he replied. "I guess I did."

Colette smiled. "Good…because that's what I asked for too."

Zelos looked back at her, startled. "What?"

"Well, I really asked Santa to give everyone what they asked for," she admitted sheepishly. "But when you said you asked for the same thing every year, and I worried that you never got it, I wanted to make especially sure Santa gave you your wish. That's what gave me the idea to ask for all our Christmas wishes to come true."

"Seriously? _That's_ what you asked for?"

She nodded. "Yes. I wanted everyone to have a great Christmas…including you, of course. You deserve it too."

Zelos stared at her for a moment, his eyes wide with disbelief. Then, quite unexpectedly, he began to laugh. He simply threw his head back and laughed, so loud that all the chatter quieted and the room suddenly stilled. And while he knew that the others were probably wondering what was going on, the thought of their disturbed expressions only made him crack up harder.

Finally after a few moments, Zelos managed to stifle his laughter so he could try to catch his breath, though a few snickers still continued to escape. Lloyd took the opportunity to ask, "Zelos…are you okay?"

The redhead waved him off, still trying to control his chuckling. "Yeah, yeah…I'm fine."

Colette frowned deeply, a worried expression in her eyes. "But…why are you crying?"

That subdued him slightly, and he reached up to confirm that tears were running down his cheeks. "It's fine," he insisted with a sigh. "It's nothing."

"Zelos," Lloyd said – he spoke in that familiar serious, concerned tone that he used when he knew something was wrong, "if there's something bothering you, you know you can tell us."

Normally just the _thought_ of telling anyone the truth about himself caused him to panic, to cover it with a foolish statement and an attitude that made it seem like he never took anything seriously. But surrounded by these people, by people who regarded him with concern, he realized how tired he was of hiding. Still, he replied, "I dunno…It's not exactly Christmas-y, and I don't wanna ruin everyone's day."

"It's okay," Colette assured him. "If it will make you feel better, then you should tell us."

Seeing that everyone else seemed to return the sentiment, Zelos shrugged and wiped the remaining tears away. "Okay…but don't say I didn't warn you…"

* * *

The bells from the church echoed throughout the city, filling Meltokio with the familiar chime of Christmas. To many, the sound of the bells was sweet, instilling the nostalgic warmth of the season to those who lingered outside. But as Zelos walked along the snow-laden streets, he couldn't think of anything more haunting.

It was strange to be walking alone on Christmas. He was used to being around a group of people at some party or something. Even in those rare years when he didn't celebrate the holiday, he was still surrounded by people, or even just with some _one_ …never by himself. But after the time he spent telling the others his story about his first time seeing snow, and his mother…and what she _said_ that day…he couldn't stand seeing the pity on their faces, and he left as soon as he finished.

He was a little surprised that no one followed him when he left, though. And he wasn't sure whether to be annoyed that they didn't, or relieved. Because he wasn't sure if he wanted anyone with him…as he finally arrived in the cemetery.

There were some remaining people, still around after the service earlier that day. But he knew none of them would bother him as his feet led him to the Wilder plot where his parents were buried.

He stood before their graves, looking at his parents' tombstones that stood side-by-side. He never liked how his parents were buried beside each other, especially since everyone knew they didn't like each other. But he had only been a kid when they died, so he didn't have much of a say during the funeral arrangements…

Zelos shook his head, trying to clear his mind. After finally mustering up the courage to come here, he couldn't let his mind be distracted with thoughts like that. He couldn't keep avoiding this any longer.

"Hey…Mom, Dad," he said. He rubbed the back of his head, feeling the need to do something in his uneasiness. "Uh…Merry Christmas."

Even though it was only their grave markers, it was still as difficult talking to them as it had been in person. But swallowing his anxiety, he continued on.

"I uh…I know I'm probably the last person you wanna see, but…since I haven't seen you guys since your funerals, I thought it was time for a visit."

He sighed, feeling a little colder as he released the warmth he had been holding in. "I'm not sure if you guys are happy or not that I'm still hanging around. I mean, after what you said, Mom, you might be disappointed that I'm not dead yet. But then again, if I'm still alive, then at least you guys are somewhat happy I'm not where you are…right?"

There was no answer, not that he really expected one. So he forced himself to speak again.

"Listen, I uh…I know that our family wasn't all that great…and I know it was because you guys never wanted to be together. So…so I guess, what I'm trying to say is…I'm…sorry…" He closed his eyes and bowed his head. "I'm sorry that you guys had to give up so much just to have me. And…I'm sorry I never said anything about it until now.

"I mean…I always knew it was my fault you both were so miserable. But I just…I just didn't wanna admit it, y'know? I didn't want it to _be_ my fault. And I spent all this time, pretending to act the way I do, because I wanted people to pay attention to me. I just wanted to be important, I wanted to matter…I wanted to _mean_ something to someone." He chuckled dryly, brushing some hair away from his face. "I know that probably sounds pretty stupid."

"Not really."

Somehow, Zelos wasn't really surprised to hear the recognizable voice as a figure approached from behind. He was embarrassed, though, as he wondered how much the other had heard, so he did his best to avoid eye-contact as the other came to stand beside him.

"I was wondering how long you would take to find me," Zelos quipped, disguising his awkwardness behind the teasing tone.

To that, Lloyd gave no reply. Instead, he said, "So these are your parents?"

The redhead nodded. "Yup, here they are, the great Wilders. Aren't they a good-looking couple?"

Lloyd made a slight face. "Don't joke about things like that."

To be fair, even Zelos knew how bad it sounded. But he had a tendency to say stupid things when he wanted to cover how he was feeling. It had become something of a reflex. Still, knowing when to admit he made an inappropriate comment, he muttered, "Right. Sorry."

A silence fell on the two swordsmen then, but only briefly before Zelos finally turned to Lloyd curiously. "So what're you doing here, anyway?"

Lloyd shrugged. "I heard somewhere that no one should be alone on Christmas. Plus, the others were a little worried."

Zelos frowned. He knew they would be, but hearing Lloyd say it made him feel ashamed for running off the way he had. "Well, you can tell 'em I'm okay. I just need a little bit longer."

Taking the hint, Lloyd nodded in understanding. "Okay. I'll let 'em know. But first, I just wanna greet your parents."

Zelos blinked. "Okay…?"

Lloyd smiled, and if Zelos didn't know better, he could've sworn he saw something planned in the younger man's eyes. "Well, since I'm already here, I might as well."

"I guess." Zelos stepped back to let the other stand before the graves. "They're all yours."

Lloyd stepped forward, standing between Zelos and his parents' headstones. "Merry Christmas, Mr. and Mrs. Wilder," Lloyd said. "You don't know me, but I'm a friend of Zelos'. And I just needed to tell you something…especially you, Mrs. Wilder. You need to know…that you're wrong about Zelos."

Zelos' eyes widened slightly in surprise, but before he could say anything Lloyd continued. "The truth is, a lot of people would've been in trouble if it wasn't for Zelos. So we're all really glad that he was born. Now, I don't know how you two really felt about him, but it'd be kinda sad if you couldn't appreciate your own son…when he's so important to _us_. And if nothing else, I'm glad to have him for my friend."

Lloyd suddenly turned, walking away from the graves before Zelos had a chance to say anything. "See you when you get back," he called when he left.

Zelos watched him leave, staring after him until he was out of sight. Then he turned back to the gravestones and let out a small, shaky laugh. "So that was Lloyd," he said. He placed a hand over his face, leaving it there for a moment before flicking crimson bangs from his eyes. "Yeah, he can be a bit of an idiot sometimes." He laughed a little before falling silent again, thinking. Then he smiled. "But you guys should really thank him. After all…he's the reason I'm not dead yet."

* * *

Running a hand through his drying hair, Zelos decided to take his time making his way down the hall. He felt a lot better now that he was dried off and warmer, though he knew it was more than just getting out of the snow.

After spending a little while longer at his parents' graves, Zelos finally chose to head back to the others because he didn't want them to worry about him anymore. He was a little nervous, though; it had taken everything he had just to tell them the story, but he wasn't sure if he was really ready to talk through it with them just yet.

Luckily when he returned, the others seemed to realize that. And after making sure he was all right, they simply let things rest as they were. They _wanted_ to talk to him about it, he could see that, but they simply opted not to. He wondered if Lloyd spoke to them before he got back.

Either way, the rest of the day had been spent doing clichéd Christmas Day-type activities; having fun, putting presents to good use, and just spending time with each other. He hadn't even really minded when the others suggested having some fun outside in the snow.

Well…not _too_ much, anyway. He was making progress, but it had to be a little at a time.

Luckily, they didn't spend a lot of time outside before it was time for dinner. And needing more time to dry and freshen up – a little more time to think – before he ate, Zelos had gone in a little earlier than the rest of them.

But now, even though he was pretty hungry, he couldn't help but pause before he entered the dining room, watching everyone talking and helping get dinner ready. Leaning against the doorframe and folding his arms, he felt a smile form on his lips.

"Hey…you okay?"

Glancing over his shoulder, he grinned. "Was it your turn to check on me or something?" he teased.

Sheena frowned as she approached him. She seemed slightly annoyed by his remark, but was trying to keep her temper in check. "Seriously," she said.

Turning back to watch the others, he pondered her question for a moment. "Yeah," he finally said slowly. "I think so…"

"Are you sure?" she prodded. "I mean, to hold something in like that for so long…"

He shrugged. "After a while, I just got used to it."

"You still could've told someone." She hesitated before adding softly, "You could've told _me_."

Zelos looked at her, noticing she seemed suddenly shy. "Well, everyone has their own problems. Even you. I didn't want to burden anyone else with mine."

She looked at him. "Zelos…"

"Don't worry about it. I obsessed with my problems enough as it was that I didn't need more people fixated on me." Smiling, he winked. "And yeah, it'll take a while to completely get over…a _really_ long while…but it can only get better from here, right?"

She studied him for a moment, trying to see if he was just writing this off once again or if he really meant what he said. Then she nodded. "Right. But just remember, you _can_ talk to someone if you need to."

He salute to her. "Yes, Ma'am," he retorted.

She lightly swatted his shoulder, an amused smile on her lips. Then she paused, a thoughtful expression taking over. "Can I ask you something?"

Zelos raised a curious brow. "Depends."

"Well…Colette said you used to wish for the same thing every Christmas, but never got it until now. And I was just wondering…what _did_ you ask for?"

The redhead smiled, a little self-conscious. "You can ask all you want, but I'm not answering that one."

Sheena almost pouted. "Why not?"

"It's…kinda corny."

The ninja blinked. "Oh, c'mon, it can't be _that_ bad. What is it?"

He hesitated for a moment, then looked back at the people in the other room. "This," he said simply.

"What?"

He waved his hand, motioning to the others as they set the table. "I wished for this."

Sheena followed his gesture, trying to understand. "A crowded room full of noisy chatter?" she joked.

But Zelos smiled. "Sure. What's better than a house full of people who care about you on Christmas?"

Thinking about that for a moment, Sheena smiled as well. Then she laughed softly. "Yeah, you're right. That _was_ kinda corny."

"I told you so. But I hear that's forgivable this time of year."

Still smiling, Sheena gently patted his shoulder, and they stood in a comfortable silence watching the others for a while longer.

Then Lloyd glanced in their direction, pausing from what he was doing as he grinned. "Hey, check it out," he said, drawing everyone else's attention towards Zelos and Sheena.

"Aww!" Colette exclaimed. "Look who's under the mistletoe!"

Zelos and Sheena stiffened, and they both looked up at the same time to see the small shrub hanging above them.

"Hmm," Raine said, pretending to be thoughtful. "What was that tradition with mistletoe again?"

"A kiss, I believe," Regal replied, the teasing tone barely hidden even in his voice.

Zelos and Sheena glanced at each other again, and the redhead grinned. "Well, _I'm_ not complaining."

Sheena huffed, her lips pursed together tightly. " _Fine_ ," she grumbled. "But _just_ on the cheek, got it?"

"Whatever you want, my mistletoe hunny."

She grimaced at the nickname, but said nothing and closed her eyes, standing still as she offered her cheek to him.

He observed her for a moment, and decided that she just looked too cute. So he quietly moved around her and gave her a quick kiss on her lips anyway.

Sheena's eyes flew open, looking at Zelos in shock. Then anger quickly took over her expression, and the others laughed as Zelos ducked around the table with Sheena chasing after him.

Zelos didn't mind, though. Even as he dodged the summoner's hand wishing to hurt him, he was just glad to finally be home for Christmas.


End file.
